I feel a bit like the cupid.com radio ad
the guy that turns out to be married, the one that wants to shower you
with financial security but is so not the one that puts the spark back in you,
too tall, too short, complete hippy and so not your normal, still lives with his mother and he is how old,
the WAY too old, WAY too young, respect the military great guy but you have mental issues,
seems nice enough but no, total redneck deeper than many, really you wear your jeans inside your boots,
from another country and barely speak english, the trucker,
send a text after catching a glimpse from distance in parking lot and person doesn’t look like photos and say
sorry I changed my mind, wanting more than one person in the bedroom,
Another military great honorable man but worked loooong hours and then had his kids to care for never having time for me
and where I felt he was a man of integrity I did’t feel any priority just late at night when he had a min,
the amazing guy that was near perfect yet he wasn’t ready for commitment
Lets just say I learned
a lot, I wiggled my way out of many dates, yet a few became friends even if all we did was talk on phone or text
having never met in person which really this was the case with many I chatted with online
But I was done with dating sites started deleting accounts
When it happens it happens became my attitude
then one day I was looking on craigslist for housing and found my way to the personals
next thing I know I was putting an ad on there
HA really still can’t believe I did it.
I posted June 27th, had 2nd thoughts on the 28th all I could think about was the
Lifetime movie.. The craigslist killer…
and went to delete and couldn’t-
I didn’t realize you can post w/o being logged into your acct
well you can and then can’t edit or delete or anything-
June 29th I rec’ an email unlike the billions of others that began flooding my inbox
I nearly deleted it based on his photo sent reminded me of Si from Duck Dynasty
beards are just so not my type of thing but something in his eyes I didn’t hit that delete button
I kept going back to the email not knowing why
finally June 30th what the heck just email the guy sent a photo when so many didn’t
he actually responded and put details
into his email -you teach your kids to not judge a book by its cover so why are you?
a few emails back and forth nothing serious just simple and then he emails another
updated photo where he says he usually keeps his beard neat and trimmed up
and wow what a difference but regardless I was already liking him based
on our short emails it was enough to keep me coming back
I even walked away from the email my life was crazy busy who am I fooling I don’t have time
for a guy in my life then not sure what really changed or happened
but there was connection I couldn’t deny
the more we talk the more floored I am
Our lives have been so paralleled since at least 2004
We both lived in Colorado the same time frames not too far apart even
but to the best of our knowledge never met
we lived in Texas last year same times and only recently
back in Montana again until now never having met
Makes me think of the movie Meet Joe Black
the stars are aligned just perfect for our paths to cross
I deeply feel even if I had deleted his email Destiny would have had us meet another way
my reading that was done back in March where Carl came to us
he said there was a man that would enter our lives
that I wouldn’t be sure of him at first
but that he was a good guy and it was okay
deep down I feel this to be Brad
I felt the change in how I felt on July 5th and suddenly remembered the reading
I can’t even begin to put to words how blown away I am
in the few short weeks I have fallen deeply in love with him
we have done so much together in the short time we have had
he works a lot and is gone but the time together
has felt more than many get in a lifetime
from grocery shopping and both going to grab same item, same brand
without ever saying a word about what we were picking up
camping was the best, weddings with friends, he even went to do a shoot with me
it was nice to have him there by my side and even help me out a bit
walks taken, sunsets/sunrises shared, campfires, dancing under the stars and moon to what has become our song
all of it the little things that make this world go round
he hasn’t batted an eye at and truly had a smile in his eyes and on his face
no matter what it is one can think it the other is already saying it
or we go to just say something and it is the same thing as the other is saying
He loves my kids above anything else in this world
that means the most to me
He hasn’t spoken negatively about his ex just that they were never right for each other
he was in denial at first but no longer- to me this speaks volumes to his character
one of the guys I have chatted with all he did was speak negatively…very much so…
about his ex and it grinded me the wrong way. It didn’t work out don’t dwell on it
He puts actions with his words and this speaks loudly to me
We are moving forward to an amazing life together even Paige is sweet on him and loves him
I almost think she would trade me off for him.
I think all the first guys chatted with was to let me experience other walks of life out there
so I would know when the right one came along.
since I had questioned if I would know…I can say without a doubt I can see Brad
as a part of my life forever he completes me and makes my soul dance
Fate and destiny walk hand in hand. Destiny said we were meant to be, but fate brought us together
Nothing happens by chance. It was the way things were meant to be, in their own time.
People destined to meet will do so apparently by chance at precisely the right moment.
There is one simple truth to live by….Everything will turn out alright. -Let go of worry and believe.
His work schedule will be difficult for now, but we will make it work for us
work hard, think happy, worry little, love unconditionally –
rest your mind and believe that you have a purpose here…
so let it happen and be OK with that.
I am and have always been a believer that what’s meant to be will always find a way
Meeting Brad was destiny, liking him was an uncontrollable desire, but falling in love with him was out of my control
the more we talk the deeper I fall the more I realize this is my new path in life
I will forever more love Carl, but our vows were completed the day he took his final breaths
til death we did part he will always be a big part of who I am
I am truly ready to move forward and grateful an amazing man has been brought
to cross my path. It is like we have known each other from another past life maybe
I feel like that Verizon commercial …infinity times infinity that is how I feel about him
I love him that much
Sometimes, people never get what they deserve because they’re too busy holding on to things they’re supposed to let go of.
It was time to let go and move forward
there is room in my heart to love another
The new normal sucked but I see life again I started seeing it when we came back to MT
and I really have seen it these past 3 weeks
Was the move to Texas a bad move..financially maybe…healing no it was what we needed
uprooting and going to KS I think was just a stop on the way to where we belonged…
back to where we started only now I can see the beauty in it all again
and not just because Brad is in our lives but because I did a lot of healing while we were away
now I feel I can finally settle in and make a house a home…
everything is falling into place so just waiting on a house to come our way now.
Whatever your decision, remember, there is an outcome.
Be prepared to accept whatever it may be and realize YOU made the decision so take responsibility for it
I am not going to say things done this past year and half have been all the right ones
but in the moment it felt what needed done and in part the harder bumps
were maybe because they were the wrong ones and I wasn’t listening close enough.
I am not going to second guess what was done
what wasn’t done just accepting they were part of the road I had to travel and learn from
An invisible thread connects those who are destined to meet regardless of time, place or circumstance.
The thread may stretch or tangle but it will never break.
Everything led to this moment for Brad and I to meet
This relationship and bond we have never ceases to amaze me
…there are certain times in your life when I guess you’re not supposed to have anybody, you know?
There are certain doors you have to go through alone so that you can cherish and know
when the right one comes along
Even making a mistake won’t allow you to escape your destiny in this world.
Sometimes the “mistake” is necessary to guide you on the right path of true happiness.
When destiny decides, no one can stop that…